youve been stopped by the cutie police please step out of the car [kisses u on the cheek] have a good night
When your celebrity crush explains what they want in a relationship:
one of my main nicknames courtesy of my family is “emmy” and my uncle was like “what if you marry a guy named anthony whose nickname is tony then you’d be emmy and tony”
and then “what if his last name was award”
and then my cousin put in “if you have a son you could name him oscar”
emmy, tony, and oscar award
oh my god
*seductively eats a french fry*
QUICK QUESTION WHY THE FUCK AM I THE LOG IN SCREEN?
Thanks guys. 33 notes later and I still don’t know why the fuck I’m the log-in screen.
*runs up to newborn baby* ARE YOU PAYING TOO MUCH FOR YOUR CAR INSURANCE
there is so much potential for comedy gold right the fuck here and you aren’t even trying tumblr
I’m going for a run everyone wish me luck
update: cars are all honking at me I don’t know why
no no no that definitely can’t be it